The Law Wins

Ok.  What I’m about to tell you isn’t fun.  It’s just not.  I had thought today, with a little kid-free time I might speak about New Year’s resolutions but something has come up.  Something I must address because my family not only “backs the blue”, my family is THE BLUE.  Our income, our goals, our schedule, our mindset and our lives are enmeshed with that of my husband’s and he is a police officer of 15 years now.  We are beyond proud of him; a man of integrity and character who truly strives to always do what’s right and do a fine job even if it doesn’t earn him anything or if anyone sees or showers him with appreciation and/or accolades. 

You see, I was just sitting at the table in my unusually quiet house eating some leftover Christmas tamales and reading an article on the Star Telegram app.  The article featured the video and information regarding an officer who was recently called out to a disturbance involving a mother that accused her neighbor of grabbing her 7 year old son by the throat because he threw trash on the ground while the neighbor was trying to paint his fence.   These are the only actual facts clear in the article.  The rest is sort of up for grabs.

I don’t know what really happened, and truthfully from the one-sided, limited view video it seems the officer was a little curt at best.  But, here’s the thing.  It doesn’t matter and I don’t care.  What was the most striking in this video was the woman being handcuffed and placed in the police vehicle screaming obscenities and touting the fact that she was filming it all and she would put it online.  NO, that was not the language she used but that’s the point she was trying to make.  In that moment of extreme stress and I’m assuming fear, her best defense was not to talk to the officer calmly and show that the situation could be controlled without the need for her or anyone else to be handcuffed but instead to become combative and scream at this other human being in a position of authority. 

I’ll say it again, I have no idea what really happened or the circumstances prior to and after this short video.  I don’t know and I don’t care and for this discussion it just isn’t pertinent.  I wasn't there and you likely weren't either, we have incredibly limited details, so it would be foolish and unwise to choose a side.  I'm going to wait on forming a band of mother's sworn to defend this mother and her 7 year old because I just don't know what happened.  Actually, 10 years ago it would have been none of my business.

We live in a world where someone like me can share an opinion with such ease.  A plain old suburban wife and mother can post whatever I freaking feel like on some controversial Facebook thread or article online.  It’s a little deceiving, actually.  Because now society sort of implies that my opinion matters; that it’s of grave importance even. 

Now, I like to write.  Love it, actually.  Always have.  Having a space to do just that and having an audience is a blessing to me.  There are sometimes we must speak out on issues and encourage one another but that is not the case with the Law. 

So, let me explain this to you just in case you missed it.  If we didn’t have the law and people to enforce it we would all be colossally screwed.  There are laws to keep peace, to protect you, to protect your property; that give you the right to defend these things.  There are laws to keep the bad guys from doing bad things.  There are laws that keep us all relatively organized and pretty much steer clear of anarchy.    There are even rules to protect you if you’re involved in some sort of misunderstanding where someone thought you might be breaking said laws but you were, in fact, not. 

Your opinion, in relation to the law, matters not.   It matters when you vote, or if you're on a jury yes, but that’s it. 

Sometimes the law is pretty dad gum inconvenient.  I mean, when I’m in a hurry I don’t really want to drive 40 miles an hour down the busy street in my neighborhood I’d rather go 55.  If I get pulled over and written a ticket how ridiculous does it sound if I say the speed limit just shouldn’t be 40 there??  Even if I blogged about it, demanding progressive change in our city speed limits, posted an obnoxious comment on Facebook that was hurrahed and applauded and liked by forty two thousand people, nine dogs and four parakeets it doesn’t make it any less of a FACT that the speed limit WAS forty miles per hour, I was going fifty five, and I was breaking the law.  That’s my fault, folks.

If you are caught up in a situation where a police officer is trying to do his job, discern who the “bad guy” is and contain a stressful situation, the WORST possible move you could make is to appear a threat or better, a screaming, uncontrollable, angry, fearful, anxious, rabble rouser type of a threat.  Instead of resolving an issue and making the law work the way it is supposed to you have just not only interfered, you have just become, the “bad guy”. 

Let me reiterate, the video mentioned above was simply a discussion starter.  I don’t know what happened, I don’t care.  I’m encouraging you to have personal responsibility. 

So, here’s what I have to say.  I (and the law) don’t care.  Not right now anyway.  If you can’t respect the law and its ability to maintain our democratic society why would you respect those who put on a uniform and go to work every day dealing with complete idiocracy just to protect you and your family?  Your family’s things? 

If you don’t respect the law, the officers sworn to keep the peace derived from that law then you must think that your opinion trumps both of those things.  You must think that whatever injustice you have been served in your lifetime is simply that, not your fault.  You are an unjustly treated victim and you must protect, by whatever means necessary, your opinion.  

Maybe that woman had every reason to be upset.  Maybe that officer knew, and this is usually the case in these viral “cop” videos, a lot more about that situation than we do watching a video taken on somebody’s phone in a tizzy.  Maybe that officer has not only adequate training to handle such things but a protocol that must be followed to ensure that…wait for it… the law must be followed and the peace be kept.  Maybe he’ll be in big doo-doo with his superiors if he “takes the law into his own hands” and he knows it.  I just don’t know.

What I do know is that screaming at an officer is not a good way to get your point across.  Screaming at anyone, really, I would discourage.  Unless you're screaming for help or screaming to scare the raccoons away from your trash cans.

Again, it matters not who was wrong or right here.  What I am disgusted with is this idea that if I make a big enough stink, and if I get enough people to follow me on social media, then I am right.  THAT is what makes me right.  What the law says must be bogus if it contradicts my feelings.  Peace officers must be part of some larger conspiracy because social media told me so.  I don’t like being controlled, especially by an authority figure so that must mean that authority is oppressive and must be overturned. 

Get a grip, people of the media world.  Sometimes things just absolutely stink.  Sometimes I screw up and there are consequences.  As I tell my kids, (over and over and over again as they fight with each other or complain about having to do their chores) the longer you point fingers and claim that it’s not your fault, the less responsibility you take, the less control you have over your outcome.  You’ll be a victim forever.  In any situation there are always choices. 

Be quick to listen and slow to speak.  Hmmmm.  Wise words.  Be a servant.   That’s what we’re called to.  It’s sometimes easy to forget when we get all worked up.  In every situation there is a right choice and a right way to behave. 

AS a side and final note, it’s getting really upsetting to see great officers like my husband go to work every day to serve only to be disrespected, taunted, scrutinized, youtubed and instagramed.  If they seem a little curt, cut them some slack, they’re desperately trying not to let that effect their character and integrity and to still serve and protect you.  They’re also struggling not to bring those issues home to their spouses and children.